


Dark On Me

by NovemberBlue (Cherrypie62666)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Canon divergence because season 4, Fluff, Gay Keith (Voltron), Healing Pod, Hurt Keith (Voltron), Hurt/Comfort, Injury, Keith/Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lance can't keep his cool, M/M, Mutual Pining, Not when Keith is hurt, Pining Lance (Voltron), Slow Burn, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Trigger warning; ptsd anxiety and potential depression, Why Did I Write This?, just a heads up, klance, klangst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-14
Updated: 2017-11-22
Packaged: 2018-11-13 23:08:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 20,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11195403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cherrypie62666/pseuds/NovemberBlue
Summary: Eyes slipped open, the world a wash of muted tones and blurry edges.  The sky above was an endless grey swirl of dreariness, the rest of the image a blob of dark purple hues.  They didn’t stay open long before he squeezed them tight, a rush of pure agony rippling through his being all the way down to his bones.The hint of something prickled in the back of his mind, a sense of urgency he just couldn’t seem to shake; but for the moment, the only thing he could focus on was the horrible pain that spasmed across every last one of his muscles, and the aching throb that twisted nails into the base of his skull.A low groan ripped from his throat, body constricting itself into a fetal-like position as he rolled gingerly onto his side.  Was he hit by a truck?  It sure as hell felt like it.  A big one, going at least 60 MPH.Wind whistled across the land, kicking up dust particles and tickling the exposed skin of his face.





	1. Into the Abyss

**Author's Note:**

> I took the title from the song by Starset, which a friend informed me was a good fit for this fic. :3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prepare for another one of those one of them is hurt and the other freaks the fuck out fics. :3

Lance was floating through the abyss, adrift in a sea of endless darkness; no thoughts, no sounds, no feelings, only black.  It wasn’t even the stifling heavy kind of darkness, that crept into your nasal passages and seemed to want to suffocate you from the inside as it blocked all of your airways in a thick, sticky substance.  Just tepid monotonous emptiness, spanning outward for infinity.

His limbs were heavy, the receptors in his brain refusing to send or receive signals that would allow him fluidity of motion, pinning him down in a supine position.  And yet, his entire being was lighter than air, twisting and spinning through this span of eternity like a leaf caught up in a storm drain, helpless to the pull of the water’s chaotic flow.

It was almost as if he was suspended in a void, dropped into weightlessness in the outer edges of the deepest parts of space, where nothing dared to travel, even light.  All at once he slipped through the crack and slammed back down to Earth, a rush of sensations flooding his body simultaneously until it was almost too much to bear. 

He wanted to cry out at the overwhelming torment that racked his insides, blunt edged knives digging into his sensitive flesh over and over and over; but his throat was dry, his vocal chords uncooperative, and his lungs burned fire through his chest with even the slightest intake of oxygen. 

It felt like he was dying, only somehow worse. 

And then it flatlined, the pain becoming a dull ache that spread across his nerve endings like they were dipped into a vat of temporary numbing solution, manageable, but still left woefully unattended to.  The majority of it pooled in the place along his entire backside, pinpricks of heat that ebbed and flowed in waves of excruciating intensity and barely there ripples of warmth.

Other things began to trickle their way in, slipping past his semi-conscious brain as it booted itself up steadily; a random thought here, a new sensation there, all of them dragging him forward toward the inevitability of a fully aroused state of being.

His fingers twitched of their own accord.  _What’s going on?  Where am I?_

There was a buzzing in his ears, high-pitched and whiny and terrible.  At least, he thought it was in his ears.  If this is what his surroundings actually sounded like, he couldn’t wait to leave.  The next thing he acknowledged was the heat, dry and uncomfortable, though not from any noticeable source of light.  In fact, unless he was suddenly blind, wherever he was seemed rather dark.

Eyes slipped open, the world a wash of muted tones and blurry edges.  The sky above was an endless grey swirl of dreariness, the rest of the image a blob of dark purple hues.  They didn’t stay open long before he squeezed them tight, a rush of pure agony rippling through his being all the way down to his bones.

The hint of something prickled in the back of his mind, a sense of urgency he just couldn’t seem to shake; but for the moment, the only thing he could focus on was the horrible pain that spasmed across every last one of his muscles, and the aching throb that twisted nails into the base of his skull.

A low groan ripped from his throat, body constricting itself into a fetal-like position as he rolled gingerly onto his side.  Was he hit by a truck?  It sure as hell felt like it.  A big one, going at least 60 MPH.

Wind whistled across the land, kicking up dust particles and tickling the exposed skin of his face.

He tried that vision thing again, blinking against the swirls of grit that seemed to float in his aqueous humor, eyes crossing and uncrossing as lids fluttered sporadically.  Something bright red caught his attention far off in the distance, a hump of mass that looked so horribly familiar, it was almost terrifying.

Shooting upright, he ignored the protest in his limbs, rolling onto all fours and scurrying across the expanse of hard rocky surface at a snail-like pace, wincing each time a sharp pebble dug itself into his hands or wormed its way around the protective plate on his knees.  It didn’t matter, not at that moment, as he grew ever closer and the mass became even more hauntingly recognizable.

“Keith,” he croaked out in a scratchy and pathetic sounding whine, grabbing onto the Paladin’s bicep and tugging his body until it gave and rolled over, giving him a better view of the other’s crumpled form. 

Training had warned him against such actions, told him that it could seriously injure someone if they had cracked ribs or other serious ailments, but panic overtook the cautious part of his brain and he was desperate for the answers a quick check of vital signs could give.

Keith’s helmet was still on, the oxygen mask sealed and the entire visor caked in a thick purple dust, obscuring his face from view.  His armor was scratched and blackened along his torso like he’d stood a little too close to a fire of some sort, but it didn’t appear to be punctured anywhere, which was at least one good thing. 

Sitting back on his knees, he removed the helmet with shaking hands, assessing the damage beneath.

There was a minor cut on his right cheek, bubbles of red-brown dotting along the surface of the wound that was also somehow flecked with purple debris.  His skin was pale and glittered with sweat, his hair plastered here and there against his damp forehead; but the most worrying sight, the one that had Lance sucking in his breath, was the trickle of crimson that ran down the side of his blood splattered lips, crusty in the place it had pooled in his helmet next to his ear.

“ _Keith_ ,” he reiterated futilely, running frantic hands along the other’s neck to check for any signs of life.  The armor covering his chest made it impossible to see if he was still breathing, so Lance nearly cried out in relief when the slow thrum of weakened heartrate kissed his fingertips over and over again.

Keith was alive, at least for now.

Glancing around, he searched for his helmet, having only just realized it wasn’t sitting atop his head.  It would account for the terrible pain in his skull, fingers ghosting over a lump that felt like he’d either been knocked out with something heavy or else the looming cliff not even ten feet away was the culprit for most of his strange injuries.

Flashes of memory swam in his mind’s eye, blinding heat and a terrible sensation like he’d been blasted backward by a violent force.  A sickening feeling pooled in his gut, glancing upward toward the top of the cliff some one hundred feet above his head. 

_Did we really fall from all the way up there?_

A small area surrounding the edge was scorched in the same smoky black as Keith’s chest, pieces of crumbling rock littering the ground in a wide vicinity directly below it.  The sight didn’t do much to quell the panic coiled tight in his stomach, so he turned his attention elsewhere for the moment, assessing his surroundings with a critical eye.

The cliff was more than just tall, it stretched outward on either side of him, running down the expanse of the world for miles and miles, seemingly without end.  The sky was still swirled in clouds of charcoal and silver, but hints of golden hue could be made out along the edges, so there was probably a sun setting somewhere beyond that cliff.  The rest of the land the opposite direction was relatively flat, spanning an enormous distance until it curved slightly against the dark grey horizon, bleeding into the deep purple of the rock.

The only thing he didn’t see was his helmet, so he shoved Keith’s over his head, holding back a wave of nausea as the acrid scent of coppery blood assaulted his airways.  “Hello?  Guys,” he croaked, opening up the mask to allow cleaner oxygen into his lungs.  Mostly clean, it did feel a little gritty going down, and smelled a little like rusty metal, but it wasn’t going to make him vomit.

“Lance? Is that-“ static overtook the transmission for a moment, words choppy as Hunk babbled on about something that he caught only a few words of.  ‘Keith’, ‘hours’, and ‘are you’ being some of those he understood entirely and could guess at their context.

“You’re cutting out real bad on my end, buddy.  So, if you can hear me, Keith is unconscious and probably badly injured.  I don’t remember what happened, but I can’t find my helmet, and we’re near this seriously large and looming purple rocky cliff, with nothing else for miles and miles.  Assistance would be lovely.”

“Alright, Yellow is-“ more static interference, followed by a short pause and a whoop of excitement.  “Got both of your locations locked in, we’ll be there in a few ticks.  Hold tight, dude.”

“Thanks, Hunk.  Over and out.”

Taking the helmet back off his head, he set it down beside Keith, rolling onto his bottom and bending his knees up to his chest with a wince.  His spine hurt something terrible, and he was pretty sure a few of his ribs were either bruised, cracked, or outright broken, but he ignored the pain, staring down solemnly at the other Paladin’s motionless form.

Keith still hadn’t so much as creased his brow, face slack and empty of any signs of emotion or life.  He looked almost peaceful, in a sick sort of way, unmoving, unblinking, completely quiet.  What he wouldn’t give for that sour expression to pull softly at his features, or that smug look of satisfaction to dance across his face, even if it was directed at something stupid Lance had said or done.

There was a moment there where he’d panicked that Keith might have already given up the fight for good, but when Lance scrambled forward, dropping an ear over the other’s nose and mouth, he could hear the raspy intake of oxygen slowly filling his lungs.  It was labored and wet, probably choked with fluid or blood, but it was still better than nothing.

A sob erupted from his chest, a wash of relief mixed with feelings of regret and inadequacy.  There was nothing he could do to ease the other’s suffering, no medical knowledge to alleviate the condition and assure Keith’s survival.

All he could do is sit, wait, and hope for the best.  Wrapping arms around his legs, he buried his face in his knees, too upset to cry, too exhausted to do much else. 

_Please.  Please just hold on.  A little bit longer._

The familiar sound of engines cut through the thick silence that surrounded them, the yellow lion touching down a few feet away.  Hunk raced to their sides faster than Lance had ever seen him go, and he’d been there for all you can eat ice cream night at the Garrison.

“Alright, I gotcha,” Hunk murmured softly, gingerly lifting Keith up to transport him to the little cot inside while Lance hobbled his own way in, still ignoring the growing pain in his chest.

Hunk babbled as they readied themselves for takeoff, rambling on about how Shiro and Pidge assured their Lions would make it safely back to their hangers, and that Coran already knew to have a healing pod ready for both of them, just in case.

He thanked his friend quietly, sitting back against the wall near the cot, watching the red Paladin for any signs of a struggle.  Keith’s expression remained ever placid, lips parted slightly, head tilted toward him in the semblance of serene sleep.  It was a lie, but he closed his eyes, pretending for a moment it was the actual truth, that nothing was wrong.

_You’re going to be alright.  Just a little bit longer.  I promise._

As they took off into the blackness of space, Lance reached out and clasped the hand that dangled lifelessly at Keith’s side, entangling their fingers gently.  It wasn’t much, but he hoped that somewhere, deep down in there, the other felt a little better with Lance by his side.

* * *

 

_A distress call from the Circinus galaxy found them flying to a small desert planet named Alarkari near the outermost spiraling ring, the only known inhabitants a large mole-like alien race with three glittering black eyes in a pyramid formation on their rodent faces, and bright golden fur._

_The Alarkarians mostly lived below ground and only came to the surface on occasion, usually after the sun set due to their similar sensitivity to bright lights.  They’d built their cities in the thick crust like layers of the purple rock planet, with stretches of tunnels skirting so low, they almost touched the planet’s molten iron core two hundred miles below._

_For the most part, they were friendly and intelligent beings, though they rarely had any contact with other lifeforms, which had kept them relatively safe for centuries, and out of the 10,000-year conflict with the Galran Empire._

_Until that is, Galra had set up a base of operations to extract the absurdly high levels of raw quintessence from their planet’s liquid core, holding the poor creatures captive, much the way they had the Taujeerians, as they drained the planet of all available resources in the name of progression._

_The five Paladins set out, Shiro and Hunk going deep into the tunnel systems to free the Alarkarians from their imprisonment, while Lance and Keith stopped the Galra forces from turning the planet into an unstable, volatile mass._

_Easier said than done._

_Pidge stood by to help both sides figure out how to maneuver the intricate tunnel systems, using her cloaking mechanism to go unnoticed through the skies as she took a scan of the entire planet, before uploading it onto her ship’s system and following their progress through tracking and coms._

_They landed their lions behind a large outcropping of rock a good distance out of sight, using the corresponding tunnel systems to try and sneak up and into the base.  Luckily for them, the Galra had utilized a section of the planet that had multiple vents leading straight to the surface, one of them directly adjacent to their machine’s control room._

_Dropping down into one of the vents, the two Paladins landed with a quiet thud._

_“Alright, if you follow this tunnel to your left for a quarter of a mile, you should be able to straight-shot it to the control room no problem.  I’ve hacked into their system, and the patrols only happen every fifteen minutes, which means you’ll have to be fast, but you can definitely do it.”_

_“Thanks, Pidge, keep us posted,” Keith mumbled, using his searchlight to illuminate the inky blackness that swarmed around them._

_Lance wrapped arms around himself and shivered.  “This place gives me the creeps.  Can those Alarkarians really see in all of this darkness?”_

_Keith shrugged his shoulders in response, just as Pidge’s voice rang static in his ears.  “For the most part, yes, though the Galra have cleaned out certain sections of their tunnels for their own benefit.  From what I can gather, they use these soft glowing crystals in their cities to create a gentle lighting effect, and normally have them lining the tunnel walls so they can navigate easier.”_

_“Gotcha, so we just got the lucky tunnel that’s super creepy,” Lance muttered darkly._

_Pidge snorted.  “More or less.  But this is also the least used backdoor entrance.  I could have sent you down the ones with guards all over the place, but I figured the quicker and quieter, the better.”_

_“You’re my hero, green,” Lance quipped, earning a crackly sounding cackle from the small girl._

_Keith ignored their good-natured back and forth, for the most part, focusing his attention on the crumbled walls and the occasional rumble from above that sent bits of purple dust trickling down on their heads._

_A little way further down, the Galra had set up lighting equipment to illuminate the space, so Keith turned off his own light, falling back into a small alcove to peer around.  “What’s the status, Pidge,” he murmured quietly, holding out an arm to keep Lance at bay._

_The sound of keys clicking could be heard for an instant, followed by a low hum of contemplation.  “According to this data, the patrol should appear in the tunnel on the right in two minutes, and then they’ll continue down the path ahead of you for fifty or so feet, before looping back around.  Once they pass, slip into the tunnel, and it’ll take you directly to the control room.  Just be quick about it.”_

_“Got it,” Keith said, glancing to Lance to assure he, too, understood the mission._

_Lance gave him a double thumbs up and a cheeky grin in response, falling equally silent as the two waited patiently for the seconds to slip past._

_Three droids carrying large guns stepped out of the tunnel and looked around, heading off the direction Pidge had promised a moment later.  Keith tugged him along behind as he bolted out from their hiding place, racing down the smaller tunnel as quickly and quietly as possible._

_“How much further,” Keith asked after a beat, dropping his hold on Lance’s arm._

_“Not far.  There’s a cross tunnel up ahead, then a chute up to the surface at the end a few feet after.  Take that, and you’ll come up in the main part of the base.  You have ten minutes until the next patrol.”_

_“Roger that,” Lance said, following behind the red Paladin as they made their way across the remainder of the tunnel._

_Their jetpacks helped them reach the small hatch, throwing it open and peering out carefully.  The circular room was large and empty, with three hallways branching out in a Y shape around them.  No guards were standing watch near the control room door, so they slunk out quickly and raced toward the entrance._

_Two droids stepped out of an adjacent room unarmed, stopping the Paladins in their tracks.  A confused beat passed between the four of them before Keith pulled out his Bayard and cut through the first of the droids easily.  The second one got out a warning message before his body was relieved of his head, the sounds of pounding footsteps drawing ever closer shooting adrenaline right down their spines._

_“Maybe we should just-“ Lance began._

_“Run,” Keith finished, and the two took off past the droids crumpled bodies, ducking into the control room and blasting the locking mechanism off the door, effectively sealing it shut.  “Well, that takes care of one problem, I guess.  But now we’re going to have a hell of a time getting back out.”_

_“I’m already on it,” Pidge murmured, fingers clicking across her keyboard at an even faster pace.  “Alright, if you can get out of that room directly through the wall behind you and head down the hallway to your right, there’s another chute into a tunnel that connects back to where you first came in._

_“How in the world are we going to,” Keith muttered._

_Lance cut him off with a devious smirk.  “Leave that to me,” he chirped, aiming his rifle at the Quintessence extractor and pumping it full of dozens of holes.  The machine hissed and groaned as it died, sparks flying from its paneling while metal dripped steaming molten puddles on the floor._

_Keith quirked a brow at him when he was finished, eyeing the small person sized opening with amusement.  “Crafty.”_

_“I aim to please,” Lance beamed, returning his Bayard back to normal.  “Plus, two birds, one stone.”_

_“Good job, Lance.  The coast looks clear, boys.  Better skedaddle,” Pidge’s voice crackled with static once more.  “Just take the hallway down and enter the chute when you see it.  I’m going to be helping Shiro and Hunk for a moment, they’ve made it down to the Alarkarians and will need to be guided out safely.  Over and out.”_

_The coms were silent as they raced down toward their escape, the sounds of blasters taking out the control room door echoing behind them as they went.  Finding the chute was easy enough, as was getting back down into the maze-like tunnels.  The hard part came when they ran straight into a new pack of droids, fighting them off as they turned tail and raced off blindly into the unknown._

_The purple rock did very little to help distinguish one tunnel from the next.  Keith led the way down twists and turns, delving deeper and deeper into the labyrinthine design, desperately calling for assistance between bouts of fighting as wave after wave of Galran soldiers seemed to come at them from out of nowhere.  They sliced, shot, ducked, rolled, evaded, sidestepped, and stabbed at their enemies until sweat dripped down their faces, trickling drops that stung their eyes._

_“I don’t know how much more of this I can take,” Lance panted, following Keith down a dark tunnel glittering with small glowing orbs of light._

_“Yeah, I’m pretty spent myself, and I can go most of the day on the training deck.”  Keith stopped running to catch his breath, glancing around at the different intersecting routes they could take.  In the distance, more Galran soldiers could be heard scouring the area in search of them.  “We need to find a way up, it’s our best bet to get back to the Lions.”_

_“I wonder why the com is still dead silent,” Lance mumbled, brow creasing in thought.  “You don’t think something bad happened, do you?”_

_Keith shook his head.  “No.  But we’ll worry more about that once we find a way out of here.  Come on, let’s try this route.”_

_They walked for some time in the harrowing silence, the occasional rock kicked accidentally down the path reverberating around them in a chorus of echoing clatters and pings.  The only good sign, or perhaps it was actually a bad one, was that no more soldiers found them as they trekked on for what felt like hours through the mild darkness._

_Lance let out a long sigh.  “If we ever get out of here, I’m insisting on taking the job that doesn’t involve walking on foot next time.  Seriously, I’m pretty sure my blisters have blisters on them at this point,” he moaned, wiggling his foot about for emphasis._

_Keith stopped suddenly and held up a hand, sniffing at the air like some sort of bloodhound.  “Wait.  Do you smell that?”_

_“What?  If it’s horrible, I don’t think I want to know.”_

_“No, idiot.  Smell the air.  It smells… fresher?”_

_Crinkling his nose, Lance took his own hesitant sniff.  “Yeah, sorry, dude.  I only smell the same old metallic rock we’ve been surrounded by for god only knows how long now.  Maybe you’re starting to get carbon dioxide poisoning or something.  Should we use the oxygen masks?”_

_“No.  I think…” Keith sniffed around a bit, eyes searching the glowing walls.  “It’s this way, come on.”_

_Lance followed reluctantly along, the two of them taking a pathway that steadily slanted upward as it wound them through twisting corridors and slightly narrowed passageways.  It took forever, but the hints of light could finally be made out in the distance, a small hatch three feet above them leading back out to the surface of the planet._

_Lance hoisted the other up without a second thought._

_“We should try to call for help once we’re topside,” Keith murmured, pushing open the hatch and climbing carefully out.  He offered down a hand and Lance happily took it, scrambling out with a grin._

_“You don’t know how happy I am to see… ah, shit,” Lance mumbled, pulling out his Bayard and aiming it at the group of thirty or so droids that were closing in on them fast.  “Can’t we ever just catch a break?”_

_“Doesn’t seem like it,” Keith muttered, following suit and crouching low in preparation for the attack.  “And watch out, there’s a steep drop behind us, I’d say about 100 feet.  There’s no place to run, so we’re just going to have to take them all down.”_

_“My favorite,” Lance drawled, blasting a droid once it was finally in range.  “Backed into a corner when I’m running on fumes.”_

_The droids drew closer in a flash, shooting off long ranged attacks as the red Paladin zipped in and out of their fire, knocking enemies down and cutting through their ranks like they were made from butter instead of metal and wire.  Lance hung back and covered his blind spots, taking out the few who made the mistake of gunning for Keith’s backside when he was distracted by another._

_They fought hard and fast, dropping the enemies left and right, the final droid blasted through the stomach by one of Lance’s well-timed shots.  Robotic bodies littered the ground around their feet, sparks of electricity still visible where their limbs sat awkward in their heaps on the purple rock._

_Pulling off his helmet, Lance grinned broadly at the other Paladin, setting it gently against his hip and holding it there with his arm.  “No sweat, yeah?  Took down the enemy extractor machine, fought off hordes of bad dudes, and managed to get out of those dreaded tunnels without Pidge’s help.”_

_Keith’s brow furrowed in thought, dark eyes wary as he glanced at their surroundings.  “Now we just have to figure out where our Lions are, and get to the others.”  Spinning in a small circle, he heaved a sigh.  “Just how far did we travel through those damn things.”_

_Lance rolled his neck and shoulders, feeling the tension already beginning to leave his body as his adrenaline levels lowered once more.  “Can’t have gotten too far, the planet isn’t exactly the largest rock floating in space.  Might as well just sit back and wait for someone to contact us, though, I don’t see the point in expending more energy when we don’t know where to go.”_

_Worrying a lip between his teeth, Keith glanced back toward the hatch that led down into the dark tunnels.  “Maybe we could go back through, find another way out somewhere closer to the ships?  This isn’t the only hatch that leads up to the surface.”_

_“And risk getting stuck inside those things or running into more droids?  No thanks, I say we stay right here where we know we’re safe.  Besides, if I never go into a dark and dreary tunnel again, it’ll still be too soon.”_

_Pursing his lips, Keith looked ready to argue, until Lance shot him a puppy dog look and he rolled his eyes with a defeated sigh.  Stepping around a couple of hunks of scrap metal, he walked closer to the edge of the cliff, peering down cautiously.  “Do you think we’re on a plateau of some kind, and the other side of this thing would show us some familiar territory?”_

_Lance shrugged, stepping closer to get his own look.  “Could be, though it looks like it runs all directions past where the eye could see.”  Glancing at Keith’s calculated expression, he frowned.  “I vote against trying to walk around the entirety of the planet just to find out we went the wrong way.”_

_“What about getting down off this ledge?  I feel like a sitting duck up here.”_

_Quirking a brow, Lance shot the other Paladin an incredulous look.  “Isn’t up here the easiest vantage point?  And if one of the Lions happens to fly by, they’ll be able to see us better.”_

_Keith chewed on his lip again, seemingly unconvinced.  “I just have a really bad feeling about this,” he muttered, casting another look down the side of the cliff.  “I’d feel better if our coms were working and we knew what the others were doing.”_

_“Fighting Galra, saving lives, probably meeting loads of beautiful women while I’m stuck up here with you.”  Lance smiled at Keith’s annoyed look, blinking innocently as he crossed his arms over his chest lazily.  “What?”_

_“Whatever, let’s just-“ Keith’s head whipped around suddenly, violet-indigo eyes going wide in shock.  Smacking Lance back out of the way, he threw his body in front of him, using himself as a human shield, arms splayed out wide in a protective stance._

_An explosive power rocked the ground in rippling waves, fire and smoke billowing up as beams of white light struck the path leading toward the two of them in rapid succession.  A moment later, a lone Galarn ship tumbled from the sky, crashing down in a burst of excruciating heat that sent them both flying off the cliff._

_The last thing he remembered before everything went dark was the force of Keith’s body slamming hard against his chest, knocking the wind from his lungs; and the feeling of panic as he freefell, arm reaching out in vain as the red Paladin slipped away just out of his grasp._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one might have a tad little bit of angst. If you couldn't tell. ^^  
> Most of this is already written up, I just decided to add more things to it, and thus turned it into a multi-chapter due to the sheer size. And it was supposed to be a short little thing... sigh.
> 
> Comments would be wonderful, they'll help me stay on track!


	2. Suffocating in silence

The healing pod opened in a rush of cold air, his body falling forward into Hunk’s welcoming arms.  The tiny bits of frost still clinging fast to his lashes melted down his face like tears as he blinked back his wave of exhaustion, glancing around at the worried faces of his friends and allies.  All of them, save for one.

“What happened,” he mumbled, acquiescing to the gentle nudge that told him to sit down on the little step.  His head pounded and his muscles felt slightly weak, but at least his ribs and back no longer felt like he’d been run over by a heard of stampeding water buffalo.

Hunk sat beside him, offering up a small smile.  “You passed out in my Lion while we flew back.  I don’t know how you managed to make it so long with all the damage you sustained, but we’re glad you did.  If we hadn’t found you two sooner, I don’t want to think what might have happened.”

Lance’s eyebrows knit together, fuzzy remnants of memory tickling at him from somewhere deep inside his brain.  Another wave of exhaustion washed over him, a slow yawn causing his head to droop forward precariously.  “My injuries were really that bad,” he asked sleepily.

Pidge snorted.  “You can say that again.  Three broken ribs, giant purple bruises all along your spine, some organ damage that had yet to do much physically.  You’re lucky you weren’t concussed, though your head took quite the beating from the look of things.  Your memory might be foggy for a day or two, but we’re pretty positive you’ll recover fully.”

“Oh yeah,” Lance mumbled, looking at the girl accusingly.  “We got lost in those tunnels and couldn’t get ahold of you.  What happened?”

Pidge flinched at his words, body tensing slightly.

“The Galra found a way to scramble our signals,” Shiro chimed in, placing a hand on the girl’s shoulder to offer his support.  “Hunk and I had the same problem, only we faired a lot better than the two of you.  We’re just glad you’re finally okay.”

“How long have I been out,” Lance asked, looking to Hunk.

After a beat of silence, the big guy shrugged.  “You were in there for a whole week, dude.  It was actually pretty serious.” 

Coran cleared his throat, head craning over the group from the back.  “Can you tell us what exactly happened to the two of you?  How you sustained so many injuries?”

Pidge nodded in agreement, finding her voice once more.  “We went back to get your helmet and found it at the top of that cliff.  Hunk said you two were at the bottom, so we assumed you fell or were blasted off, or something.”

Running a hand through his hair, he sighed.  “It’s kind of fuzzy, but I remember finally getting out of the tunnels and having to fight off all of these droids.  Then this ship came out of nowhere and attacked.  Keith jumped in front of me before I knew what was happening, then I was waking up on the ground dazed and in pain.”

Nodding his head, Coran clicked away at the tablet in his hand.  “That explains a lot of the severe damage to both of your backsides and organs.  And also why Keith was far worse for the wear.”

Sparing a glance over to his left, he caught sight of another cryo-replenisher, Keith’s suspended form looking much the same as the last time he’d seen him.  His face was less dirty, and the blood was mostly gone, but he was still void of all emotions, a sight that ripped through Lance’s chest with an agonizing throb.

“Is he,” he managed to croak, throat constricting before he could finish his thought.  Swallowing hard, he flicked his gaze back to the other’s solemn faces.

Silence followed in a palpable rhythm, the machine nearby humming softly as it continued its intended purpose.

Shiro rubbed the back of his neck nervously.  “We’re still not sure.  His heart stopped beating sometime before we got him to the castle.  His brainwaves were still active, and they managed to revive his heart before putting him in, but there’s no way to know how long all that damage will take to repair.  If it can all _be_ repaired.  Or if the machine is only acting as an artificial life support until he gets out.”

Lance’s mouth fell open in shock, looking from Pidge’s red brimmed eyes, to Allura’s sullen face, to Coran’s slumped form, falling back on Hunk who looked positively heartbroken next to him.  “You mean he might… I-I didn’t save him in time?”

Allura stepped forward, hands hanging limply at her sides.  Fingers twitched like she wanted to reach out and comfort him, and he was almost relieved when she didn’t.  “Lance.  You did everything you possibly could.”

Hunk rubbed his back in small, reassuring circles.  “Yeah, buddy.  Without you, he wouldn’t have made it this far.  If he pulls through, it’ll be because you got to us in time.”

_If?_

Coils of anxiety clenched tightly around his heart, a spike of icy terror plunging down into the pit of his stomach.  “No.  _No._   Without me, he would be _fine._   I’m the reason he’s in this mess.  _It’s all my fault._ ”  Hands flew up to cover his face, breath coming out in quick, shallow gasps.

Pidge kneeled in front of him, brown eyes sparkling with strange emotions.  Grabbing hold of his wrists with a gentle firmness, she pried them away.  “Listen to me Lance, no matter what happened, no matter what you think you’ve done, it is _not_ your fault.  Unless you physically pushed Keith off of that cliff, which from the sound of things I highly doubt, you didn’t do anything wrong here.”

“But I did,” he cried, flinching away from everyone’s comforting hands.  He didn’t deserve comfort, not after everything.  Not if Keith wasn’t saved.  “He wanted to leave and I told him we should stay because it was safer than going back into the tunnels.  If I wasn’t being stubborn… if I didn’t have to always get my way… he would be fine.  I could have let him go alone, and then he’d be fine right now.”

Shiro frowned at that, stepping forward with arms crossed over his broad chest.  “You know Keith would never leave you alone on an unknown planet when communications were down and there was no telling what might happen to you if he did.  It’s a good thing, too.  You’re alive because of it.”

Hunk winced as Lance scrambled to his feet, pointing an accusatory finger at the others.  “Exactly!  I knew he’d let me have my way, and it’s my fault he’s injured.  If I just listened to him…  If I wasn’t always so…” he deflated instantly, knives or torment stabbing him in the chest.

“Lance,” Shiro murmured, holding his hands up in a placating gesture.  “You know that’s not what I meant.  No one thinks anything is your fault.  _Keith_ wouldn’t even blame you for what happened.  You made a smart move, sticking to where you knew you were safe from enemies.  No one could have known something like that was going to happen.”

“Keith knew,” Lance whispered hoarsely, feeling the prickle of tears as they stung at his eyes.  Gulping down the lump in his throat, he pressed on.  “He said he felt uncomfortable, and I ignored it.”

“Lance,” Hunk pleaded desperately, reaching up to grab onto his wrist.

“It was the right decision,” Coran offered with a tight smile, one that didn’t come close to reaching his eyes.

“Since when have Keith’s feelings ever been wrong,” he challenged, steeling his resolve.

Five sets of eyes turned down to the floor, the unspoken agreement weighing heavily on all of them.  Keith was never wrong when he felt like something wasn’t right.  His instinct for danger is what had saved many of their lives, time and time again.  And now, because Lance hadn’t listened, Keith could…

Allura shook her head, leveling him with her fierce blue gaze.  “No, Lance.  No matter what could have been, or what decisions we think we should have made instead, you cannot let sorrow and regret keep you down.  You did everything in your power to help save his life.  Whether he pulls through or not, you should be proud of how you handled things.”

“But I-“

“No,” she scolded before more self-deprecating things could tumble from his lips.  “You did more than anyone could have ever thought possible.  You pulled yourself up when your body should have been shutting down and came to the aid of your fellow Paladin, putting your own torment aside in the process.  There’s still hope.  Have faith.”

Hot tears trickled down his cheeks, lower lip trembling as he opened his mouth.  “And what if it wasn’t enough,” he breathed out, barely audible over the whir of the healing pod as it continued to artificially sustain Keith’s life.

Allura smiled at him, sad as it might have been, holding out her arms in an offer of comfort.  “Then we’re here for you, Lance.  We’re a team, and we’ll figure things out together.”

Throwing himself into her warm embrace, he buried his face into the crook of her neck, twisting fingers into the cloth of her dress.  Sobs of regret ripped painfully from his chest, and the two of them sank down to the floor as he let wave after wave of raw emotions wash over him.

* * *

 

“You should probably get to bed, yeah?  It’s getting late, and you’re still healing.”

Hunks words came to him from some place lightyears away, trickling through the fog as his mind slowly worked to process them.  Without breaking eye contact with the soft blue glow of Keith’s serene face, he turned his head slightly toward the direction the sound had come from.

“Hm,” he asked, blinking sleepy eyes slowly as they threatened to slip closed under the sheer weight attached to them.  “Did you say something?”

Letting out an exasperated sigh, Hunk placed a warm hand on Lance’s shoulder.  “Come on, buddy.  I’ll take you to bed, you clearly need it.”

Lance opened his mouth to protest but was met with a huff of annoyance.  Pouting out his lip, his brow furrowed.  “What if I’m not ready for bed yet,” he sulked, sparing his first sidelong glance in the last three or so hours.

Hunk was looking at him with a mixture of pity and remorse.  “We’ve been sitting here since you emerged from the pod six hours ago, dude.  Now I know you’re worried, but there will be plenty of time to sit around here in the next coming days.  According to Coran’s readings, Keith won’t be better for a few weeks.  A couple of hours rest will do you some good.”

Rubbing his tired eyes, Lance slumped in his seat.  “I guess I am pretty beat,” he admitted, stifling a yawn with the side of his curled fist.  “The healing pods take a lot out of you.”

“Yeah, and crying, and stress,” Hunk ticked the things off on his fingers, offering a sheepish smile when Lance glared at him.

“I wasn’t crying.”

Hunk snickered.  “Right, must have been something in your eye, huh?”

Lance scoffed loudly.  “Dude, my poor ego.  Can’t we just pretend like that whole freak out moment didn’t happen?  Cut me some slack, I was in a bad place emotionally and mentally.”

Rolling brown eyes, the larger boy stood up, offering down his hand.  “I don’t even know what you’re talking about.  I recall rainbows and kittens and warm group hugs.  Freak out moment?  What’s that?”

Lance smirked, rising to his feet at the protest of his achy limbs.  “Oh, man.  That floor really isn’t the best place to hang out for hours on end.”

“A nice night’s sleep will do you some good,” Hunk said with a soft smile, clapping him on the shoulder gently.  “Come on, I’ll walk you there, I happen to live close by.”

Lance shook his head with a chuckle, allowing the other to guide him through the medical wing’s doors.  Before they had a chance to close entirely, he spared a glance back at the soft pale glow of the cryo-replenisher, his world a wash of stark white, dark black, and icy blue.

The hallway was quiet as they made their way down to the rooms, Hunk humming a semi-familiar tune as the two of them kept pace.  Lance watched his bare feet pad along the hard surface of the floor, feeling a glimmer of panic begin to work its way down into his chest.

_What if something happens to him and I never get to say goodbye?_

The thought struck him so suddenly it was like a sucker-punch to the gut.  Air whooshed from his lungs, limbs stiffening painfully as he halted his advance, a whimpering sound spilling from his throat.

Hunk glanced at him curiously, brow furrowing in concern when he caught the look of sheer terror pulling fast at his features.  “Lance?  Buddy?  What’s wrong?”

Fingers curled tightly into fists, nails digging hard into the sensitive flesh of his palms until he knew it left little marks.  In a moment, the feeling was gone, trickles of embarrassment worming their way into his mind, causing him to smile sheepishly.  “Ah, sorry.  I was just.”  He waved his hand flippantly.  “You know, a sudden bout of lightheadedness mixed with fatigue and what have you.  I’m better now.”

Hunk narrowed his eyes apprehensively but nodded.  “Alright.  If you’re sure.”

“I am,” Lance laughed, the sound horribly forced, even to his own ears.  His mouth stretched hard into what he hoped was a slightly more convincing smile, picking up the pace with hurried steps.  “Man, I can’t wait to be back in my own room.  I know I don’t remember being in there, but I swear it feels like I haven’t slept in my bed for over a week.”

“That’s because you haven’t,” Hunk pointed out, bumping his shoulder gently as they hurried even quicker down the hall.

The two parted ways at Lance’s door, Hunk’s room still further down.  He made a point not to look at Keith’s door as another stabbing pain of strange emotion began to work its way into his gut.

“Well, goodnight, Hunk.  I’ll see you in the morning.”

Hunk smiled, giving him another pat on the shoulder.  “Goodnight, Lance.  Pleasant dreams, and what have you.”

The door closed soundlessly and he leaned against it, heart rate pounding fast in his ears.  Swiping an aggravated hand through his hair, he stripped quickly out of the white full-body suit necessary for the healing pods, leaving it crumpled in a heap on the floor.

The air was cold but he welcomed the change, even as gooseflesh erupted like wildfire across his tan skin.  Glancing about, he wondered briefly what he should do next.  He could shower, sure, but fatigue had already begun to slow his movements, limbs suddenly feeling like he’d been submerged in a tub of sticky honey. 

A yawn brought tiny pinpricks of tears to his eyes, so he flopped down onto the mattress, tugging the thin but warm blanket over his mostly naked flesh.  Sleep was a welcome change from the reality of his life, and as he drifted off, he hoped his dreams were kinder to him, if only for a couple of hours.

_Keith’s eyes blew wide with fear, arms coming out to shove him backward forcefully.  Lance wanted to cry out, to squawk at the other for such a rude gesture; but then the boy stepped in front of him, splayed his arms out wide in a protective stance.  The curve of his muscled form was taut with determination, the glint of yellow sunlight reflecting brightly off his red and white suit._

_The first beam of blinding light struck the ground and shook the very foundation on which they stood.  Lance spared a glance backward, wondering if they shouldn’t step away from the edge of the cliff; but then the next shot came, and the next, waves of heat and smoke and debris assaulting him in a full-frontal attack on his person._

_Even with Keith taking the brunt, he was still barraged with horrible sensations to his exposed skin, helmet slipping from his fingers as his arms flew up to protect his face from the smoke and heat.  Why did he take it off again?  Surely he knew better, even if he had been sweating buckets in the thing for hours.  They weren’t safe, not until they were back at the castle._

_It wasn’t safe._

_A looming mass slipped from the clouds, dark metal glinting in the dying rays of light as it spiraled down toward the cliff in a nosedive like a hawk zooming in for the kill.  Billows of thick black smoke poured off the end as it cut through the air in a wailing scream, the sound so horribly deafening that he was covering his ears before he even understood what was happening._

_When it hit the ground, a wave of purple rock rushed up to greet them like an angry storm.  The air grew thicker, charged with an electric energy that crackled around him, causing his hair to stand on end.  Time slowed down exponentially, each wisp of curling smoke or chunk of falling rock tumbling toward the two of them at a snail-like pace._

_A wave of heat washed over him, the force of the sudden blast knocking Keith backward into his chest so hard it stole the very air from his lungs.  He gasped and wheezed, but only ash and fire found their way into his throat, burning down his airways and choking him even harder._

_As the two flew off the edge of the cliff, he reached out toward the other Paladin, catching sight of crimson pools in the corners of his mouth and a dark marred mark that covered his entire front side.  Panic washed over him, fingers stretching in vain as the wind rushing up to greet them flung the two further and further apart._

_He heard the sickening thud of a large mass bouncing off the land, just before tepid darkness pulled him in._

Lance woke up panting hard and drenched in sweat, fingers pawing desperately at the blankets wrapped constricting around his legs.  In his chest, his heart fluttered like a scared bird in a small cage, thundering into his bones and threatening to worm its way out of his mouth and run off into the night.

Glancing at the clock, he noted the still unbelievably early hour.  He’d only gone to bed sometime in the last four hours, and no one else would be awake for another four at least, which left him few options in his suddenly very awake state. 

If it were any other night, he’d head out to the observation deck to see if a certain other person was in a similar boat. 

The thought alone sent a horrible ache rippling through his chest, so he kicked off the blanket roughly, slipping from the mattress with a groan.  Glancing around, he grabbed at the first semi-clean smelling articles of clothing he could find on the floor and pulled them on.  He didn’t bother with a pair of shoes, just tugged on some socks and called it good.

Maybe a walk was needed.  Maybe afterward, he could sleep again.

The castle was dark as he made his way through the quiet halls, footfalls nearly silent as he shuffled along like a zombie with no real destination in mind.  Passing the kitchen, he spared a glance into the empty room, wondering if food was the cure for the strange sensation clutching at his heart.  The answer was a quick no, and he continued aimlessly down the hall, a gentle sigh tumbling from his lips.

The training deck wasn’t the answer, nor was the bridge with its Lion hanger doors, even if Blue’s calming presence could be felt wrapping around him softly as he passed by.  The observation deck nearly gave him a panic attack when he got too close, and the ballroom was just a boring empty room when there weren’t people there to fill it up with happy laughter and a warm presence, so he left those behind, as well.

Before he knew it, he was standing in front of the med bay doors, quietly wondering if this was the answer to his strange dilemma.  A flutter in his chest pushed him gently forward, the urge to assure the other’s safety clawing at him something fierce. 

The doors slid open as he approached, the interior darker than when he’d left earlier that day.  The room was quiet, soft blue glow rippling along the walls and floor around the healing pod, Keith’s body still serene and somber where it was encased behind the glass.  A gentle hum could be heard, the machine working to keep his body frozen in a state of perpetual stasis until his wounds all healed and it deemed him well enough to leave.

Feet moved of their own accord, and before he knew what was happening, he was reaching out to touch the cool exterior of the pod, fingers splayed out over the area he realized ironically was probably Keith’s heart.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, voice thick with raw emotion.  “I should have listened to you.  I’m sorry that you got hurt because of me.  I’m just… I’m sorry, Keith.”

Sliding down to the ground he leaned back against the healing pod, feeling the cold from the glass sinking deep into his skin.  It was nice, in a chilly sort of way, and the soft whir of the machine behind him helped to ease the aching sensation that had burrowed itself into his chest.

Eyelids drooped down, a tired sigh escaping from his mouth.  The last thing he remembered was a gentle smile tugging at his lips, the shine of blue light on his well-worn jeans; and then sleep reached long arms out to catch him as he fell into its soporific embrace.

* * *

 

Lance awoke to the gentle murmurs of voices surrounding him, a chilly sensation cupping his backside in an almost welcoming stroke.  Eyes opened slowly as they took in his surroundings, the pale glow of electric blue light mixing with the soft warmth from the fluorescent bulbs overhead.

_What’s going on?  Where am I?_

Coran stood with his back to him, clicking away on a large screen near the center of the room.  Allura, Hunk, Pidge and Shiro stood further back toward the door, whispers mixing softly with the whir of the machine behind him.  It took a moment for his memory to fully kick in, and then all at once, he felt a strange sensation bubbling in his chest, the realization of where he was throwing his heart rate into overdrive.

_I fell asleep in the med bay.  Oh shit._

Two heads turned his way as if telepathically sensing his inner plight.

“Good morning, sleepy head,” Pidge quipped, quirking a brow at him in an amused fashion.

Hunk gave him a sheepish look as his gaze flicked back to the others hastily, Allura and Shiro still too busy whispering things to one another to acknowledge the slight blush that had started blooming across his cheeks.

Lance sat up with a low groan, stretching aching limbs high above his head.  “What time is it,” he mumbled, voice still slurred thick with sleep.

Pidge lifted one shoulder in a half-hearted shrug.  “It’s midmorning, though the concept of hours here is still wildly abstract.  Call it ten or so, maybe ten thirty.”

 _I slept in?_  

As a habitual early riser, he rarely if ever stayed asleep past nine.  It was like his internal clock wouldn’t allow him to do so, even out in the middle of space where light could never slip across a dim room to rouse you prematurely.  The fact that he had either meant he was seriously ill or in serious need of rest. 

A small part of him wondered if it was the company, but he pushed it away as quickly as it surfaced.

“Oh,” he said with a stiff nod, skipping his gaze over the others in the room.  Hunk was still sheepishly trying to avoid his eyes, and the remaining three acted as if they didn’t even notice him yet.  "I uh… I should probably eat something, then.”

Shiro finally glanced over at that, putting up a hand to halt his heated looking discussion with the princess.  “Hey, Lance,” he murmured, dark eyes shining with a hint of worry.  “How are you feeling?”

Allura turned his way with an eerily cheerful smile pulling hard at her mouth, as if she wanted to pretend it was completely normal to find him laying against the healing pod.  “Oh good, you’re finally up.  Once you’ve eaten, prepare yourself.  We need to head out as soon as possible.”

“Where are we going,” Lance asked as he stood up on slightly shaky legs.  His bottom was sore from the hard floor, muscles protesting the movement as he twisted his spine to ease the tension pooling in his lower back.

“There’s been a distress call from the ice moon of Ellyd.  The message was cut off abruptly in the middle, but we managed to discern two key things.  Galra, and help.”

Running a hand through his hair, Lance frowned.  “Isn’t that a little sketchy?  What if it’s another trap?”

Allura’s forced smile cracked, her face becoming a tight mask of strange emotion.  Pursing her lips, she seemed to internally debate something for a moment.  “It is not our place to ignore a call for help.  If it is a trap, we’ll figure things out then.”

Lance looked to the others for their reactions, finding a mix of hesitation and determination.  “And what about…”  The name hung on the tip of his tongue, swallowing it back down as the urge to turn and glance up at Keith’s frozen state niggled at his brain.  He wouldn’t give in.

Shiro’s eyes flicked to the place just behind his head, expression becoming somber.  “We’ll be fine.  The likelihood of needing to form Voltron is quite slim, but we’re not going to take any chances, regardless.  If things look bad, we’re getting out of there, stat.”

Allura nodded in agreement.  “I do not expect you to risk your lives for a shoddy distress call.  I trust your judgment, and I know you’ll be fine.”

Worrying a lip between his teeth, Lance acquiesced.  “Alright.  I’ll be ready soon.”

The princess smiled warmly, eyes going soft like pools of crystal blue light.  “Thank you, Lance.  I know it isn’t easy to get back out there after-”

Lance waved a flippant hand her direction, pulling a lopsided smirk onto his mouth.  “Nah, I’m just covering all the bases.  You know me, I bounce back quickly.”  Inclining his head toward the door, he took a step closer.  “Well, better get a move on.  Sorry for keeping everyone waiting.”

He shuffled out of the room before he lost his nerve, powerwalking his way down the hall and back toward the kitchen.  Heavy footsteps followed in rapid succession, Hunk’s slightly ragged breath alerting him to his pursuer before the big guy had a chance to catch up.

“Lance, wait up,” he wheezed.

Slowing to a stroll, Lance stuffed hands into his pockets, glancing sidelong at the yellow Paladin as the two fell into step.

“So,” Hunk murmured after a beat of silence, running a hand through his already slightly disheveled hair.  Lance knew the habit as something the other tended to do in times of stress, and from the look of things, Hunk was feeling the anxiety _hard_.  “Do you wanna… talk?”

“About,” he asked, feigning innocence.

Hunk released a long breath of air through his nose.  “Couldn’t sleep?”

Lance made a noncommittal noise in the back of his throat.  “More or less.”

“You good?”

“Yeah.  I’m good.”

“Alright,” Hunk sighed.

The two made it the rest of the way to the kitchen in awkward silence. 

Lance caught the other’s eyes on him from time to time, looking as if he had more to say, but wasn’t quite sure how to broach the topic.  Stopping at the door, he pulled a lazy smile onto his face.  “So, I’ll see you down on the bridge when I’m finished eating.  Shouldn’t take me long.”

Hunk blinked a few times before giving a short nod.  “Okay.  See you.”

Spinning on his heels, he disappeared behind the safety of the door, letting out a small sigh once it had closed audibly behind him.  He scanned the machines and cupboards critically but finding his appetite sorely missing, plopped down into the closest chair, resting his forehead on the cool surface of the table.

Eyes slipped shut as he slowed the sporadic pounding of his heart, taking deep breaths to quell the anxiety that had already sunken claws into the pit of his stomach.  Seconds passed, stretching outward slowly as he counted them down one by one, gauging an appropriate amount to realistically pretend he’d finished a meal.

When the time finally came, he rose to his feet and left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a different plan for this when I started it, but then I decided why not ride it out for all it's worth?  
> I guess it'll end up being a bit longer than I planned.
> 
> Comments are alway appreciated. It was my birthday when I began this chapter (June 19th), but now it's 3AM and I appreciate the love. ;)


	3. The Deteriorating Mind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't forget this<3

The world was a wash of blinding white as the Lions touched down on an icy plateau, the ongoing roar of the blizzard making visibility impossible anywhere beyond five or so feet.  The team had spoken briefly of their mission on the way down, making jokes and fooling around to lighten the heaviness that had overcome each one of them as they left red behind; but Lance was still feeling a little too glum to join in.  If anyone noticed his lack of input, they didn’t say it aloud.

“The signal came from somewhere around here, but I don’t see a way our Lions can get to it,” Pidge’s voice came over his com, the image of the girl typing away on her computer and comparing information all too vivid in his mind’s eye.  “I’ve run a scan of the surrounding area, and it looks like there’s a chasm nearby.  I think that’s our best bet.”

“Alright, we’ll go the rest of the way on foot.  Everyone prepare to head out,” Shiro informed the team in his usual authoritative manner, firm but dripping with his uncharacteristic softness all the same.  “Keep an eye out for anything amiss.”

“Uh, I’m not too sure that’s going to be possible with this storm raging all around us,” Hunk mumbled uneasily, no doubt chewing on his thumbnail as he spoke.  “It’s kind of a wall of snow.”

“Just do the best you can,” Shiro replied.  “Stick close together so no one gets lost.  We’ll head directly for the distress call’s signal, and if we can’t find anything there, we’ll leave.  Everyone ready?”

“As I’ll ever be,” Hunk sighed.

“Roger,” Pidge chirped.

Lance stared at the landscape through the window, freezing cold and unfathomably white.  Another inkling of something uneasy churned in his stomach but he pushed it down, brow furrowing as his lips formed a thinly pressed line.

“Lance,” Shiro called softly, coaxing out his reply.

“Yeah,” he finally mumbled quietly.  “Yeah, let’s do this thing and get out of here.”

Stepping from blue’s open mouth, the cold hit him like a punch to the teeth; body tensing as every last instinct he had told him to turn around and leave.  The wind wailed angrily across the barren land, high-pitched whistling eerily haunting as a barrage of snowflakes pelted his visor, instantly obscuring his view.

“Request to put wipers on our suits,” Hunk’s voice called out through his helmet, sounding equally as cold and distressed as he felt.  “I can’t see anything with all of this snow sticking to me.”

“Raise your shields, it’ll block the worst of it,” Pidge replied breathlessly.  “I’ve put up a sonar reading on the maps, so as long as we watch our feet and don’t trip over any small rocks, we can navigate the land without actually seeing much else.”

“That sounds like a horrible idea,” Hunk sighed heavily once more.  “Why can’t we just call it good and get back to the castle?  I vote for a nice hot shower and never going to snowy places ever again.  Also, can we look into getting winter suits, maybe?  I’m pretty sure my feet just turned into Hunksicles.”

“Come on, guys, we need to at least check things out,” Shiro murmured, voice encouraging as he attempted to boost their morale.  “I understand it isn’t ideal, but that’s no reason to abandon aliens in need.  We didn’t do it on that acid planet-“

“A horrible mistake, if I remember correctly,” Hunk cut in.

“My point is, just because it’s difficult doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try.  Now let’s get going.  The sooner we start, the sooner we can go home.”

Setting off was easier once Lance put his shield up, using his free hand to wipe away the collected snow from his face.  Three of them kept in a semi U shape, blocking the worst of the storm by pressing their shields together, while Pidge hung back and maneuvered them safely through the whiteout.

“The chasm is about twenty-five feet ahead of us, we should reach it in about two dobashes, maybe three, depending on how fast you continue moving.  From there, we should be okay to use our jets to explore lower.”

“How far down does it go,” Hunk asked, sounding nervous.

Pidge typed something into her screen.  “About three hundred feet, give or take a couple.”

“Great, so enough to kill us with,” Hunk muttered.  “Remind me why we didn’t ignore this mission again?”

“Because,” Shiro said with an exasperated sigh.  “We can’t just pick and choose who gets saved and who isn’t worth our time.  We’re better than that.”

“Nineteen feet to go,” Pidge informed them cheerfully.

The break in the icy surface spanned outward on either side of the group, a seemingly endless gully cut into the planet’s otherwise smooth layer.  Despite the yawning distance horizontally, the stretch of distance from one side to the other sat only about ten feet apart, enough to be noticeable, but only just. 

The four of them halted just shy of the drop-off, held back by the fear of the deadly drop, gazing out across the navy gash in the otherwise white landscape.

“So, who wants to go first,” Pidge asked with a smirk, nudging Hunk in his ribs with her elbow.

Lance spoke up for the first time in what felt like hours, though in truth, was only minutes.  “I’ll do it,” he mumbled, deactivating his shield and stepping slightly closer to the edge.

Three concerned faces gazed at him from the corner of his field of vision.

“Uh,” Hunk said, poking his pointer fingers together in a nervous tick.  “Are you sure about that, buddy?  Because one of us can definitely go instead if you’re not.”

“What Hunk means,” Pidge cut in, leveling him with a hard look.  “Is, you’re not being reckless, are you?  Because if this is an emotional decision, it’s best to let someone else go.”

Lance scowled at his teammates, feeling a pinprick of rage.  “Jesus, Pidge, I’m not suicidal.  I just figured I’m the smartest choice if anything begins attacking.  Hunk can’t exactly use his canon as easily as I can use my rifle, and Pidge and Shiro aren’t able to fight long distances effectively.”

“We’ll all go,” Shiro decided after a beat of silence, deactivating his own shield and clapping Lance on the shoulder.  “If there is an attack, it’s best we fight as a group.  It’ll make it easier to get out if there’s too many for one person to handle.”

“The signal originated somewhere about thirty feet directly below us,” Pidge said, tapping away at her screen.  “If my calculations are correct, there’s a corresponding ledge that coincides with the data, so there’s probably some kind of built-in structure the aliens of this planet used to send it out from.  If we can find that, we can check to see if anyone’s still around.”

“Or fall into a trap,” Lance muttered, staring down into the darkness with a sinking feeling pooling in his gut.  Perhaps it was just PTSD, but steep falls weren’t exactly a good omen in his opinion.

* * *

 

“Well, that was a huge waste of time,” Hunk sighed, collapsing forward onto the table and closing his eyes.  They were back in the kitchen not long after, having just finished up a meal that tasted decidedly more like cardboard the longer Lance attempted to ingest it.  He’d stopped after five or so tries.  “I can’t believe that ancient transmission was even usable, let alone that a minor earthquake could activate the machine that sent it out.”

Pidge pointed her spoon at the rest of them.  “It wasn’t a complete waste.  We found those really cool lasers for the castle, and the Ellydians were super nice.  They even joined our cause and promised to help in the future.”

“They were literally like little, blue, four-armed gremlins,” Hunk said with an incredulous look.  “The cute ones, not the scary no food after midnight kind.  What help could they possibly be against the Galra?”

“I thought they were adorable,” Pidge sniffed, returning her attention back to her bowl of goo.

Allura clapped her hands together cheerfully.  “Pidge is right, forming alliances is an important part of our mission to end tyranny across the galaxy.  Every planet liberated is another step closer to true, intergalactic peace.”

“And the lasers will look super cool as we fly through space,” Coran chirped, striking odd poses with his arms and making little shooting sounds in an echo of the time the team pretended to fire their own lasers about.

Lance rose from his spot at the table, feeling suddenly heavy.  “I think I’m going to go lie down for a bit.  I’m still pretty tired after the healing pods and now the trek through frigid wastelands.”

“Me too,” Hunk said, jumping up to join him.  “I feel like standing in the scalding hot shower for the next fifteen minutes still won’t be enough to make my limbs feel fully functioning.”

Shiro smiled kindly at the both of them.  “Alright, we’ll come get you if you’re needed.”

“Roger that,” Hunk said with a wave.

The two of them made their way out of the room and down the hall in heavy silence, Hunk keeping perfect pace with him despite the fact Lance was dragging his feet more than usual.  After about a minute of the awkwardness, Lance finally heaved a sigh.

“I’m seriously fine, Hunk.”

The big guy glanced over with an innocent look on his face.  “I don’t know what you’re talking about, buddy.  I’m just going to take a shower to thaw myself out.  You know I don’t like cold places.”

Raking a hand down his face, he shook his head in exasperation.  “Look, I understand that you’re concerned, but I’m telling the truth.  You don’t need to follow me around like a shadow.  I’m fine.  It’s fine.  I’m really just exhausted and that’s it.”

Hunk rubbed the back of his neck as his brown eyes flicked away sheepishly.  “You know, you say that, but you don’t seem to be fine.  Kind of the exact opposite.  I get that a lot is going on right now and that we’re all just killing time waiting on the news or whatever, but you’re never this quiet and distant.  It’s like you’re punching out on all of us, avoiding the team and anything that might even resemble a good time.”

Lance pursed his lips.  “I’m not allowed to be quiet ever without it being a huge ordeal?”

“Not like this, dude.  I don’t think I’ve seen you smile, actually smile, one time since you’ve gotten out of that pod.  And don’t think I can’t tell the difference between a Lance original and a cheap knockoff.  You’re not that good of an actor.”

“It’s been like one day and I’m still running on jetlag,” Lance defended with a tired softness to his voice.  “You’ve never been in a healing pod for a week straight, it’s like I’m experiencing three whole month’s worth of recovery, all at the same time.  Even Shiro slept for two full days after he went in, and that was only three days worth.  Under half as long.  Cut me some slack, I can’t physically _be_ anything when I’m putting out fumes.”

Hunk was thankfully quiet after that as the two wound their way down to their rooms, a pensive look playing on his face.  Before Lance could fully escape behind the safety of his door, the big guy grabbed him by the arm and stared down at him with a terribly concerned gaze.

“Alright, I won’t follow you around anymore if you promise me you’ll come talk if anything becomes too difficult for you.  Even if it seems silly or pointless or you don’t want to worry anyone, you come find me first.  I’ll handle the others in the meantime.”

“Thanks, Hunk,” he murmured, smiling thinly at his best friend.  “I appreciate it, and I promise if anything changes, you’ll be the first to know.”

Hunk grinned back, pulling him into a crushing but warmly affectionate hug.  “Don’t mention it.  Just feel better soon.  We all miss silly, goofy Lance.  And besides,” he said, pulling back with a very serious expression.  “We already have a resident moody child.  Keith will be upset if you take his place while he’s unable to defend his title.”

Lance laughed, low and smooth.  “I’ll keep that in mind,” he hummed, stepping away and entering the code to his door lock.  It opened behind him with a metallic whoosh.  “See ya, buddy.”

“See you, Lance,” Hunk replied before turning and sauntering down the hall.

Shuffling over to his bed, he fell onto the mattress with a loud thwack, ignoring the sudden pain that blossomed along his chest and stole the air straight from his lungs.  Rolling over and curling up into a ball on his left side, he stared blankly at the wall, wondering what to call this excruciating ache that never seemed to want to leave for long.

* * *

 

_Violet eyes widened in surprise, pupils becoming little pinpricks in an endless sea of iris.  All around him was purple, splattering the ground, floating in the cloudy sky, staining his skin like a well of shimmering ink as it dripped down and crept its way up his body, consuming and devouring until there was nothing untouched.  It trickled its way into every orifice, up nostrils and down his throat, coloring his insides to perfectly match._

_Drowning, gasping for oxygen, he clawed at his skin in futility, blood oozing lavender smears from hundreds of paper-thin cuts.  They burned his flesh like fire licking at his limbs, destroying and reviving and then destroying once more, until pain and his body were one in the same, a synonymous term with identical meanings._

_And then, without warning, everything faded to black._

_Wind whipped through his hair as he fell, spinning and twirling at a dizzying pace.  There was no sky above, nor floor rushing up to greet him, nothing but dark and cold and vacant space.  The air inside his lungs had long become dust; seeping from his lips, not in a scream, but in a puff of grey powder that left its trail like a pathway through the black, showing his journey as it stretched back infinitely in a corkscrew of glittering brilliance._

_His bones shattered as he met the earth, a thousand broken vases hitting the ground in a roar so loud it left him deaf._

Lance awoke with a pathetic whimper, lower lip trembling in fear.  The remnants of his nightmare still flitted across his mind, horrible and griping and terribly weighted.  Despite the exhaustion still evident in his itchy eyes and weakened muscles, his heart was stuttering inside of his chest, refusing to slow even a fraction to allow him a moment’s reprieve.  Hands shook, long limbs drawing in tight to his chest as he curled up in the darkness, hoping to wait out the rest of his anxiety.

When it proved empty and futile he rose from the sheets, drenched sticky with salt from hours upon hours of cold sweat.  Changing his wet clothes into something a little more comfortable, he slipped on his shoes, fleeing the far too quiet room in exchange for somewhere he knew might help fight off his suffocating emotions before they consumed him.

Feet padded down the hall, body moving on autopilot as he made his way to the med bay without a second thought as to why he needed to.  The soft blue glow and whirr of machinery were like a soothing lullaby that embraced his fatigued mind, clasping it tenderly to its breast in the warmest of arms like a mother rocking her frantic child back to sleep.  He could tell himself otherwise later, lie about or deny the reasons for wanting to lay back against the cool glass and rest. 

For the moment, he was at peace, and that was all that mattered to him.

Lids drooped precariously, weighed down by hours of debility and lethargy like nothing he had ever known before.  As his breaths calmed and his fluttering heart returned to its previous slow and isochronal rhythm, a happy sigh escaped his lips, mouth quirking gently in the smallest of hardly noticeable curves.  Everything would be simpler in the morning.  Everything would be fine.

Lance fell into a dreamless sleep, nothing but cold and him and the sound that helped to keep his demons at bay.

* * *

 

No one said a thing to him despite the fact he steadily grew more and more agitated as the minutes slipped into hours and the hours faded into days.  For the most part, no one pestered him, carrying on their jovial conversations that fell deafly on his muted ears.  It’s not that he wanted to tune things out, it just happened that way automatically, as if listening had become a function that required forethought and practice to achieve it.

His body never truly felt good unless he was inside the med bay, either within sight of Keith’s serene face or with his back pressed against the cool glass, body immune to the chill that seeped comforting hands deep into his fevered skin.  Regardless, he still dragged himself back to bed each and every night, heavy with reluctance, only to awaken from a brutal nightmare and trek across the castle to resume his sleep in peace.

And it grew, fingers of anxiety spreading through his chest like spiderwebs attaching themselves to the corners of his empty heart.  Each moment that pulled him further from Keith’s side was one he spent drowning in thoughts of _what if, what if, what if_ , until it had become a mantra he repeated in a chaotic ricochet across his fatigue weighted mind.  What if something happens.  What if I never see him again.  What if I didn’t get to say goodbye.

Guilt tore him up inside, convincing himself of his sole blame like he had that very first day.  If he hadn’t been there.  If he wasn’t stubborn.  If only he’d _listened_.  The responsibility was on his shoulders, the weight of a life hanging precariously in the balance.  If anything happened, it was his fault.  If Keith didn’t make it, he’d never forgive himself.

The emotions inside of him became a tornado that wreaked havoc anywhere it touched down.  There were times he found himself so shaken up that he nearly vomited from the stress alone.  And not only that, it was like an ache, a physical _pang_ that throbbed along in time with his heart.  Nothing helped.  Nothing eased it.  Nothing made it better for him, except one thing.

In the end, it was simpler to remain there; locked away in that room with its calming light and gentle whirr, the both of which helped to release the vice grip on his heart, loosen the shackles chaining his lungs to keep them from filling freely with cleansing breaths. 

When that time finally came, it was hard to count just how much time had passed, the only indication that it had the visits from his teammates bringing the things necessary to sustain his life.  Like the cot Coran brought so his aching back had somewhere to lay or the food Hunk provided more often than was probably needed of someone who couldn’t taste it anymore but ate it anyway.

Sometimes they sat and spoke with him, others they remained a reassuring presence at his side.  Slowly, steadily, he felt more normal than he had in all the days prior, just so long as he never left the ring of blue glow that emanated outward in its gentle curve.  It was easy, it was safe, it was all he needed as he waited endlessly for a moment that might never come.

* * *

 

Hunk sat down next to him, offering up a cup of something that smelled oddly familiar, though not quite the same.  He sniffed as the curls of warm steam rose up to tickle his nostrils, brow creasing in concentration as he spared his friend a sideways glance.  “Is that hot chocolate?”

A smile curled the other’s lips, dark eyes sparkling with delight.  “Close as I’m ever going to get without a cacao bean to make real cocoa powder.  Thought you might like a nice cup of warm happiness.”

Lance accepted the thing with his own tightlipped smile, breathing in another deep huff of sweetness before he allowed the flavors to wash over his tongue.  It wasn’t perfect, but it wasn’t half bad.  “You never cease to amaze me,” he hummed, bumping shoulders with the bigger guy in a gesture of thanks.

“Aw, thanks, dude,” Hunk grinned warmly.  “You know, it’s also kind of Pidge’s fault.  She was reminiscing with me the other night about comfort food items, and then we discovered our shared love of hot chocolate.  I told her if she could help me find something with a similar molecular structure to cacao, I could whip us all up some whenever we wanted.  Pulled through amazingly quick.”

Lance took another tentative sip, humming quietly in appreciation.  “Remind me to thank her, as well, then.  You both sure are something.”

Hunk sighed happily, leaning back on his hands to get a better view of the red Paladin.  A silent moment passed between them, Lance taking small sips of his not quite hot chocolate, Hunk watching Keith as he sat motionless in the cryo-replenisher.  After a beat, he cleared his throat.  “You know, it’s been ten days since you came out of your healing pod.”

Lance stiffened slightly, setting down the half-empty mug on his left before he pulled his knees up to his chest, resting his cheek atop one of them to glance over at his friend.  “I know,” he replied.  He didn’t.

“So, are you ever going to leave this room, or are you taking it over as your new living quarters?”  His tone was light, joking even, but Lance caught a hint of worry laced deep within the words that he couldn’t quite shake.

Heaving a sigh, he shook his head.  “I don’t know, dude.  It’s easier being here than it is anywhere else.  I feel better when I’m nearby like I’ll be able to fix it if something goes wrong.”

Hunk’s brow furrowed slightly at that.  “I don’t think there’s much that you’d be able to fix if it _did_ go wrong.  If the machines can’t fix it, I don’t know what can.”

Slumping forward, Lance let his gaze drop to the floor.  “I know that, but this irrational part of my brain keeps telling me that I’m needed here.  If I walk out those doors, I feel like I’m drowning or whatever.”

Hunk patted him gently on the back as he hummed in understanding.  “Ah, yeah.  That’ll happen when you’re worried about someone you love.”

A warm flush painted his cheeks, eyebrows knitting as his lips turned down in a grimace.  “I don’t love Keith.  I’m just _worried_ about a friend, is all.”

Quirking a brow, Hunk shot him a very amused look.  “You’ve refused to leave even to go shower, which, not gonna lie, you kind of stink.”  His nose crinkled for emphasis, causing Lance to scoot over self-consciously.  “And you’ve never acted this way about anyone else,” he finished with a slightly more serious tone.

“I have so,” Lance defended, crossing arms over his chest.  “And besides, nothing has ever been this serious before.  No one was hanging on the precipice of life and death, so excuse me for being worried.  I just don’t want something to happen when I’m gone, and then regret not being here.”  Looking up at the glass, he winced.

Hunk bumped his shoulder lightly once more.  “You know we have like a billion alarms set up that’ll notify us if anything starts to go south, so it’s not like you wouldn’t know immediately if you did decide to leave.  Don’t you think you’re being just a bit too hard on yourself?”

Lance grimaced harder.  It did sound pretty absurd when Hunk put it that way.  “I just… I feel too anxious to leave him.  And I can’t sleep, I get nightmares that would have me coming here in the middle of the night anyway, so it’s just easier to stay.”

Hunk nodded sadly.  “Alright, I’m just worried about you, dude.  You’re my best friend, so it’s kind of my job to make sure you’re okay.”

Smiling thinly, Lance leaned into the other.  “Thanks, Hunk.  I’ll be fine, once this is all over.  I promise.”

“You know I’m gonna hold you to that,” Hunk teased, wrapping an arm around Lance in a comforting gesture.  Another beat of silence passed between them before Hunk pulled away.  “Seriously, though, dude.  Shower.  You need it.  If Keith comes out of there and you smell like that, he’s gonna need to go right back in.”

Lance squawked indignantly, shrinking in on himself in embarrassment.  Just then, the doors opened behind them with a soft whoosh, Shiro stepping into the room with a small wave and a strange look on his face.

Hunk rose to his feet, grabbing the half-empty cup of forgotten chocolatey drink and motioning toward the door.  “Welp, I’m gonna get back to perfecting this here hot cocoa.  If you ever want more, just come ask.  I’ll be happy to make you some anytime.”

“Thanks, Hunk,” Lance said, offering up a weak smile as he watched his friend leave.

The door closed behind him with a small click, Shiro standing in the doorway awkwardly for a moment before he closed the distance fast.  “So, how’s our boy doing today,” he asked, tone light and friendly and fake.

Lance pulled awkwardly at the fabric of his pants, feeling an impending lecture coming on.  “Same old, same old.  Coran would probably be the person to ask, I can’t read the Altean to know what his vitals look like.”

Sitting down in Hunk’s vacated spot, Shiro stretched out his legs in front of him, the ends of his boots kissing the little step below the healing pod.  “That’s alright, I’m sure they’re looking great,” he chirped, which was so creepy it actually made Lance cringe.

“What do you want, Shiro,” he asked with a sigh, glancing sidelong at his commanding officer, wondering if it was rude to ask so bluntly.  After two weeks of people dancing around him, his patience was beginning to wear thin.  “I mean, I doubt you’re here to talk about the weather.”

Shiro chuckled at that, leaning back onto his hands.  “Am I that obvious?”  He hummed quietly, clicking his boots together softly.  “I’m just checking up on you, as per Allura’s request.  You know we missed you during our training session the other day.  It was pretty quiet without your usual chatter.”

“Sorry,” Lance mumbled.  “I’m not really in the chattering mood lately.”

‘You don’t have to be chatty, but it would be nice to see you leave this room every now and then,” Shiro smiled, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

Lance nodded.  “I know.  I just don’t feel like I can right now.  I feel better when I’m here, so it just makes sense to stay.”

“Understandable.  But, do we kind of need you to get back out there.  We can’t exactly form Voltron without Blue.”

Lance’s head snapped up, blinking rapidly as he fought down a wave of sudden anger.  “Is that really what matters right now?  We can’t form it without Keith, anyhow, so who cares if I miss a session or two while we’re all stuck wondering if there will even _be_ a red Paladin anymore.”

“Lance,” Shiro murmured, changing his tone from slightly reprimanding to warm and soft.  “I understand that you care about Keith very much, but you can’t just sit in here for weeks while you neglect your other duties.

“I don’t… I… why does everyone keep saying that?”  Shiro looked lost so Lance sighed, running a hand through his hair in agitation.  “That I feel something more than crushing guilt, and that’s why I’m sitting around here waiting for him to get better.”

Something strange sparkled in the black Paladin’s dark eyes, an inkling of understanding that made Lance instantly regret opening his mouth.  “Why do _you_ think everyone keeps saying that,” Shiro probed, sounding an awful lot like the shrink his mother took them all to see after his father passed away.

Lifting his arm up in a shrug, he let it fall back down.  “I don’t know.”

“Well, do you?  Feel something more than guilt?”

Lance’s expression turned sour.  “Why would you even ask me something like that?  Of course not, I’m just worried about him, like the rest of you.”

“So worried that you won’t leave his side for a second,” Shiro asked, giving him a knowing look.

Raking a hand down his face, Lance shook his head.  “Look, I appreciate the concern, I really do.  But I’m not harboring some stupid crush here.  I’m genuinely worried about a friend, who I feel indebted to or whatever because he risked his life to save mine.”

“All of us are worried about Keith, Lance.”

“I wasn’t implying you weren’t,” Lance muttered petulantly.

Shiro sighed, turning to face the other and tucking his legs underneath him like a schoolchild.  “Let me put it this way; we all love Keith, and we’re all worried about him, but none of us have to sit here watching him because we’re too afraid of what will happen when we leave.  Why do you think that is?”

“You’re not the ones responsible for Keith getting hurt,” Lance retorted hotly, folding his arms over his chest.

“And neither are you, Lance.  Keith made his own choices.  Even if you could go back in time, warn him of what would happen, do you honestly believe he wouldn’t still jump in front of you just to assure you didn’t take the brunt of the attack?”

Lance opened his mouth to deny everything, slamming it shut after a moment’s reprieve.  Brow creasing, he thought hard about the other’s words.

Shiro smiled softly, patting his shoulder affectionately.  “Keith was a selfless person, and headstrong, and nothing would change his mind once he’d made it up.  If he decided you were important enough to protect, then it wasn’t on a whim.  He’d do it again and again, and nothing you did or said would have stopped him.  So, you’re not responsible here, Lance.”

“But.”  Lance bit his lip, glancing up into the icy blue glow of the healing pod.  “Why?  Why would he do something like that for someone like me?”

Shiro frowned.  “You’re teammates.  And friends.”

“Hardly,” Lance snorted.  “We argue more than we get along.”

“That’s not true,” Shiro replied with a smile.  “How many times did one of us catch the two of you out on the observation deck, talking about your family and how you can’t wait to see them again someday?”

Images flashed through his mind, countless nights spent staring at the stars or running through the coordinates Coran had shown him on how to find Earth.  It hadn’t started out as their special place to hang out, but after the first few times of running into one another in the halls when neither one could sleep, and after they’d both ended up wandering there anyway, the two had begun making it a point to visit the deck together at least once a week.

Keith was always the best listener when it came to Lance rambling on about the place he grew up, or the taste of his mother’s cooking; what it felt like to catch the perfect wave on a hot summer afternoon or the smell of the sea at dawn.  He hadn’t noticed before, but the other hadn’t really talked much about himself, just listened quietly with a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

Lance swallowed hard.  “Often, I guess?  I can’t really count.”

“Exactly.  Keith knew how badly you want to see them again, and wouldn’t be able to just leave you unprotected, not when he felt like you had something more to live for.”

A quiet tear leaked down his cheek, brushing it discreetly away with the back of his hand.  If Shiro noticed, he didn’t say anything.  “He had something to live for, too.”

Dark eyes regarded him solemnly.  “And what was that, exactly?”

 _Voltron, you guys, all of us,_ Lance thought bitterly, staring up into the lifeless face like he could project these thoughts straight into Keith’s brain.  One single word reverberated around his head, hot tears spilling out from the edges of his lids.  _Me, you jerk.  You should have tried to live for me._

Shiro gave him another pat on the shoulder before he rose to his feet, staring down empathetically at the other like he knew the same kind of pain.  “Just don’t stay out here too long, Lance.  We don’t want to lose two of our friends simultaneously.”

* * *

 

After that, Lance made it a point to leave on occasion, for a quick meal or a hot shower, though his feet always wound their way down to the medical wing before too long.  He couldn’t bring himself to sleep in his bed, not when his nightmares were almost as bad as the first week, with slight variations that kept them ever fresh and equally aggravating.

The worst part, the thing that had him angrily stomping from the room with clenched fists and a scream building in the back of his throat, was that Hunk and Shiro might actually be right.  He ran through their words over and again, searched deep inside of himself with probing thoughts, sorted through the muck and automatic defensiveness until he came out with two singular truths.

The first, and quite honestly it wasn’t that hard to admit, he did have eyes and whatnot; was that Keith might be sort of, maybe a little bit if you squinted enough, just a tiny smidge attractive.  Even with his stupid mullet, which really wasn’t all that bad, he still had a good enough facial structure.  And a nice body.  With lean muscles.  And a flat and hard stomach, long legs, toned arms that were _really good_ at pinning him down anytime they sparred together… he was _okay_.

The second was that he wasn’t there out of a sense of responsibility.  When it came down to it, if he ignored the gnawing thoughts and the anxious panic he got whenever he remembered that Keith might not walk out of that pod and take another inhale of oxygen ever again, he found himself drawn back to the same exact thought.  Why.  Why did he do it?  Why didn’t he save himself?  Why _Lance_?  The thought that he might never know terrified him more than anything.

Finding out the answer, that’s why he was really there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Excuse any errors, it is late and I am exhausted! (and self-beta)  
> But, I wanted it posted so I could sleep in peace. ^^
> 
> Sorry for the long wait, I'll try to be better from now on as I wrap this thing up (hopefully) soon.  
> Considering how season 4 went (started this thing before season 3) I think we can all appreciate a little bit of hurting over Keith not being around. ;)
> 
> Comments make me smile. :D
> 
> Hit me up on Tumblr - Cherrypie62666


	4. Awakening

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A month later, not bad.

It was the middle of the night when the gentle hiss of the healing pod opening jolted him awake.  Shooting off the little cot, he ran up the small step to the edge of the glass, opening his arms wide for the other to fall into.

Keith’s body sat frozen for a beat, limbs growing pinker in rapid succession until he lurched forward and tumbled down in a rush that nearly knocked Lance off his feet.  Glancing down at the thick mop of unruly black hair, he held his breath as the seconds ticked by, the boy in his arms still as lifeless as he was for the past three weeks.

Just as he was beginning to silently panic, warm breath fanned across his chest, the muscles underneath his hands twitching as they slowly began to move.

Keith nuzzled in closer for a second, a gentle sigh falling from his lips before he tipped his head back and blinked up at Lance with sleepy eyes.  “You’re okay,” he mumbled, speech slurred and thick from lack of use.

Lance laughed beside himself, shaking his head at the idiot who spent three weeks healing inside that pod and almost  _died_ , actually did die for a moment there, but was still more worried about someone else.  “I’m not that easy to kill,” he hummed quietly, ignoring the strange swell of emotion running rampant through his chest.

Keith huffed out his own choked laugh, lifting his arm up shakily in a half shrug.  “I guess I underestimated your survival capability.”

“I guess you did.”

Violet-indigo eyes slipped shut, a small smile pulling at the corners of Keith’s mouth.  “I’m glad,” he mumbled before his face slackened significantly, head lolling back as his legs gave out.  A small snore-like sound emanated from his gently parted lips, chest rising and falling as he slipped easily into a deep slumber.

Lance set him down on the cot, pulling the soft blanket over his body to assure he stayed warm.  He considered calling for the others, thinking better of it once he remembered the dimmed interior lights meant it was still considered their agreed upon nighttime, and he didn’t want to rouse anyone just to let them know Keith was passed out far too hard to even greet them.

Instead, he sat down on the boy’s side, watching intently for a moment as Keith’s shallow breaths puffed across the skin of the hands curled up by his pale face.  Warmth flooded through him, relief and joy and something he couldn’t quite place, the sensation different from anything he’d ever known before.

Closing his own eyes, he listened to the rhythm of steady, unlabored breathing, allowing it to lull him, too, into a peaceful kind of sleep.

When he opened his eyes, it was to the angry looks of his fellow Paladins; Allura and Coran looking stuck somewhere between relieved, amused, and utterly furious.  Sparing a glance at the still sleeping boy in the cot beside him, he offered the lot of them a sheepish smile, stretching arms over his head as his back protested in a rush of aching pangs.

“I can explain,” he more asked than stated, flittering over their displeased looks as they folded their arms in unison and frowned back at him harder.

“It had better be good,” Allura warned, eyes narrowing menacingly as she glued him to the spot with her terrifyingly icy blue stare.

Holding his hands up in a placating gesture, Lance shrank a little lower in his seat, back digging against the metal bar of the cot.  “I was going to wake everyone up, but then he literally passed out in my arms after saying like two half sentences.  What good would it have done if he was forced to awaken again when he’s clearly still recovering?”

“So, it was a selfless act,” Hunk grinned smugly, tilting his head to the side.  “You weren’t just trying to keep him to yourself, right?”

Lance gasped in shock.  “Why on Earth would you ever think I’d do something like that?”

Pidge snorted in response.  “Because you’re Lance,” she stated dryly.

“I’m hurt,” he huffed, crossing arms over his chest petulantly.  “Do you honestly believe I would force Keith to sleep on that uncomfortable cot just because I wanted to keep you guys from seeing him for a few measly hours longer?”

The five of them shared a look, before the chorus of “yes” pierced him straight through the heart.

 _Ye of little faith_ , he thought as he clutched at his chest, lip turned outward in a childish pout.

Beside him, Keith began to stir, sleepy little sounds floating up from his mouth before he cracked an eye open and hummed in a quiet whisper.  “Lance?”

Pointed looks all shot his way, bruising his already wounded pride even more.

“Hey Keith, how are you feeling,” Shiro asked, coming over to perch on the other side of the cot.

Keith blinked at him sleepily for a moment, rubbing at his eyes with the heels of his hands as he sat fully upright.  “Shiro,” he asked sounding slightly confused, seeming to relax some when the other nodded in confirmation.  “I feel like I’ve died or something.”

Crinkling his nose, Shiro shrugged.  “I guess technically you did?”

“Oh,” Keith nodded, humming out a sigh.  “Well, I suppose it makes sense, then.”

“What was it like,” Pidge asked curiously, scooting Lance out of the way so she could kneel before the cot.  “Did you see anything strange?  Do you remember dying?”

“Not really,” Keith admitted reluctantly, eyes taking on a faraway look as they narrowed slightly in thought.  “I just remember the explosion, and then I was waking up here just now.  Why am I in a bed, anyway, shouldn’t I have come out of the healing pod?”

Lance shot the lot of them an ‘I told you so’ look before turning back to Keith with a soft smile.  “You weren’t the most coherent person when you stepped out, so I put you down right here, so you could sleep it off.”

Keith returned the smile sleepily.  “Thanks.  I still feel a little groggy, but I can only imagine how I would have felt before I slept.”  Looking around, he furrowed his brow.  “How long was I out for, anyway?”

“Three weeks, give or take a day,” Hunk chimed in, kneeling in the place at the foot of the bed.  “Lance was out for a week, but you clearly sustained worse injuries, so it makes sense you were in there for longer.”

Nodding his head, he pointedly avoided Lance’s gaze.  “I see.  And how did we…  I mean, how did you guys find us after?”

“That would be thanks to Lance,” Allura replied softly, joining the small group as they crowded in closer around the red Paladin’s bedside.  “He got through to Hunk just as we started to panic about your location.  Luckily his injuries were less severe, or he probably wouldn’t have been able to.”

A slight blush covered Lance’s cheeks, the entire group looking to him with varying degrees of gratitude and warmth.  Dropping his gaze down to his hands, he curled them tightly into fists.  “Ah, just doing my job,” he mumbled, before chancing a glance up into violet-indigo eyes.

Keith’s face was a mask of unreadable emotion, holding his stare so long it began to feel stifling.  Lance broke the connection first, feeling the flush spread all the way down his throat to his chest.  After a moment of silence, Keith cleared his throat quietly.

“I should probably go shower and freshen up.  I’m probably still pretty gross after that mission.”

Pidge snorted, a wicked look spreading across her face.  “You think that’s bad, you should have seen L- oww.”  Brown eyes shot over to glare at Hunk, the bigger guy innocently looking around the room to feign his innocence.

Keith quirked a brow but didn’t question it.  “Right…  Anyway, I might rest some more after, I’m still feeling a little tired.  See you guys later for lunch?”

Coran clapped his hands together excitedly, a happy gleam shining brightly on his face.  “This calls for a magnificent feast!  Why, I think I know just the dish, an old recipe passed down to me from my dear old granddad, Cerilon.”  Shifting his eyes around, he leaned in closer and dropped his voice.  “The secret is the snot of the Wairytar, which is always better when collected fresh.  I just so happen to know the exact place to find-”

Hunk shot up like a bullet, wrapping an arm around Coran’s shoulders as he steered the older gentleman out of the room.  “Actually, why don’t  _I_  cook us up something, Coran?  You deserve a break after everything you’ve done for us.”

Excited chatter trailed down the hall, the words soon becoming too distorted to make out.

“Well, that was a close one,” Pidge mumbled, rising up and popping her back with a gentle twist.  “I’ll be off, too.  I was just about to crack the mystery on Shiro’s prosthetic before I was called here.  Which will definitely come in handy if any one of us happens to lose a limb.”  With a gentle wave, she wandered off.

Allura glanced at the door, then at the three of them, then back again.  Nodding stiffly, she shuffled her feet awkwardly for a moment.  “Well, duty calls,” she chirped, power walking her way out the door.

Shiro frowned at the Princess’ retreat, shaking his head with a soft smile.  Turning to Keith, he grew a little more somber.  “Do you need any help getting to your room,” he asked, voice laced with mild concern.

Keith hummed in amusement, waving a flippant hand the other’s way.  “No, I’ll be fine.  I didn’t lose the ability to walk, and I could probably use the exercise.”

“Alright, well, see you later, then,” Shiro murmured, reaching out to gently ruffle the boy’s already unruly hair.

When the door closed behind him, Keith turned to Lance with a pointed look.

Feeling the flush begin to rise back on his cheeks, Lance dropped his gaze into his lap.  “What?  Is that my cue to leave, too?”

“No.”  Lance glanced back up, noting the look of hesitation that flashed through the other’s eyes.  He seemed torn about something, like he wanted to ask a question but he didn’t quite know how to word it.  The silence stretched on awkwardly, neither boy knowing quite how to break it.  After it grew to an unbearable crescendo, Keith cleared his throat once more.  “Did you really save me,” he finally asked, face completely stoic.

“I wouldn’t go that far, I only alerted them to our location.  And besides, you saved me first,” Lance replied thickly, swallowing hard against the strange sensation burning in his throat.

Keith frowned, looking around the room with critical eyes.  His hands curled in the thin blanket, and he glanced down, idly rubbing the fabric between his fingers.  “Is this your bed, then,” he asked lightly, shifting around like it wasn’t exactly comfortable. 

It wasn’t, but he didn’t really have much of a choice in the comfortable sleeping arrangements department.  Not with his horrible nightmares and sudden bouts of crippling anxiety.

Lance shrugged in response, mouth forming a thin line as he weighed the options he had.  Even if he lied now, someone was bound to let the truth slip out eventually.  “Maybe,” he finally mumbled, reluctant though it might have been.

“So… did you watch over me the entire time?”  Keith turned to him then, eyebrow raised incredulously.

The fact it never occurred to the guy that Lance might actually care enough to do so stung a bit, but he ignored the implications of the feeling.  Ducking his head, he scowled into his lap.  “Also maybe.”

“Alright.”  Rising to his feet, Keith gave him another strange look, stuck someplace between wanting to say more and not knowing how.  “So, I’ll uh… see you around, then.”

“Yup,” Lance replied with exaggerated cheer, popping the p for added emphasis.

Disappointment washed over Keith’s features before he turned on his heel and strolled out of the room, leaving Lance with a gentle ache that spread rapidly through his chest.

* * *

 

Hunk plopped down next to him at the table as he pushed the green goo around his plate with a spoon.  After Keith had left him alone in the med bay, he waited only a couple of minutes in harrowing silence before sneaking back off to his own room and curling up for a fitfully disturbed nap.  It meant that he missed lunch, not that Keith had even graced the rest of them with his presence anyhow.  Hours later, the boy was still absent.  Not that he cared at all.

“Good to have everything back to normal, huh,” the big guy asked him with a gentle nudge to his ribcage, forcing a glob of gelatinous mush to drip off his dish onto the table.

Lance grimaced at the sight, somehow losing even more of his appetite in the process.  “Yeah, really good,” he replied half-heartedly, sliding the offending meal away from his person before he lost the contents of his stomach as well.

Hunk pursed his lips, brow furrowing in clear distress.  “Something on your mind, Lance?”

Glancing over into concerned brown eyes, he tried his best to pull a smile to his lips.  “Just a little tired after everything.  I didn’t get much of a nap in earlier, probably because I’m not used to things being so quiet.  I’ll be better after a good long rest.”

“Are you sure?”

“Pretty sure.  What other reason is there?”

A flash of something spasmed across Hunk’s face but he covered it up with a timid laugh, scooping up a hearty glob of his meal and shoveling it into his mouth.  “So, the recipe for that hot cocoa is coming along quite nicely.  I’ve tweaked it a bunch and I think it’s almost perfect now.  Care to taste test for me later?”

“Alright,” Lance said, a little reluctantly.  His uneasy stomach churned at the thought, probably from lack of a proper meal the whole of the day.

Hunk babbled on relentlessly for some time, thankfully uncaring that Lance could add little more to the conversation than the occasional nod and proclamation of ‘ah’ and ‘mhm’ or even just a ‘hm’ to show he was still listening intently.  Other people slowly trickled in to join them, but it wasn’t until a particular one showed up that he flicked his eyes over curiously, watching as Shiro and Pidge guided him to the opposite end of the table.

“-and in the end, I didn’t even get to try it because it burned to a… Lance?”

Shaking his head to clear it of whimsical thoughts, he turned back to his friend.  “I’m sorry, what were you saying?”

Hunk narrowed his eyes conspiratorially.  “Were you even listening to anything I said?”

“Of course,” Lance replied coolly, pulling a crooked smile to his lips.  “You were telling me about how Coran kept trying to add random ingredients into the flambé and it ruined the whole dish you’d prepared for us.”

“I’m actually surprised we didn’t start a small fire,” Hunk mumbled with a sheepish grin.  “Remind me to never utilize flame in the kitchen when Coran is around.”

“Honestly, dude, you probably shouldn’t use it, to begin with.  I’d hate to see what would happen if you blew a hole in the side of the ship.”

Hunk’s warm laughter rang out around him, mixing softly with the murmur of voices from the other end of the room.  Try as he might to keep his attention focused on his best friend, it continued to slip away as his ears perked up to catch bits and pieces of another conversation.

“So, how are you feeling,” Pidge asked a little too loudly, causing both of their heads to turn her way.

Keith shrugged as he took a drink from his cup.  “Well enough.  Sorry I slept so long that I missed the party.”

“That’s okay, Keith,” Shiro said with a small smile.  “The important thing is that you get better.”

Pidge joined in with a wicked smirk.  “You didn’t miss much unless you count Hunk burning the food into char.”

Keith’s eyebrow rose questioningly.  “Do I want to know?”

“Probably not,” she admitted.

Hunk slumped in his seat, partially obscuring Lance’s view of the red Paladin.  “I really wanted to try that tart, too.”

“It was quite interesting,” Coran chirped.  “I’ve never had this flambé before.  A little crunchy, but not at all a bad flavor.  Just a bit more powdered Farlap tusk and I’d say you’d have a fine meal.”

Pidge snickered gleefully.  “I’m sure you can guess just what transpired.”

“We can go join the others if you’d like,” Hunk informed him quietly as he craned his neck to get a better view of what was going on.  “There’s no rule that states we can’t all enjoy a meal together.”

Lance blinked in momentary surprise, feeling his cheeks begin to pinken in embarrassment.  “That’s alright, you and I always sit over here,” he mumbled.  “Besides, I-“

“I’m going to go hit the training deck for a few,” Keith stated as he rose to his feet, cutting off the remainder of Lance’s thought.  “All that rest has made me feel a little antsy.”

“Don’t push yourself too hard,” Shiro implored him with an uneasy look.

“I won’t.  See you all later.”

A chorus of ‘later’ followed the boy out the door as Lance watched him go with a grim expression.  Part of him wanted to shout out a protest to stop Keith, but the other part, the more stubborn and hot-headed side, decided to bite his tongue.  It wasn’t as if his opinion would matter much, anyhow.  If almost dying and spending three weeks inside a healing pod wasn’t enough to make the other cautious, nothing probably would.

Hunk nudged him gently in the arm.  “You were saying?”  Warm brown eyes softened as they regarded him with sadness, an indescribable look playing out on his tanned face.

Shaking his head, Lance climbed out of his own seat.  “I think I’m going to go to bed early tonight.  I’m not really feeling very well.  Raincheck on the hot cocoa?”

“Alright,” he conceded, smiling a little too cheery all things considered.  “Feel better, buddy.”

“I’ll try,” Lance muttered as he escaped the room without a second glance back.

* * *

 

_Indigo eyes dulled slowly as they stared unblinkingly up into the swirling grey sky, trickles of unnaturally bright red dripping from a slackened jaw and parted lips.  Pressing his trembling fingers to the other’s pulse point, he felt the weakened beat as it struggled to sustain the boy’s life._

_‘Hunk,’ he called desperately into the com on his helmet, voice hoarse and eyes stinging with pools of unshed tears.  ‘Pidge?  Shiro?  Allura?  Anyone?’_

_Silence was all that greeted him, a hot wave of wind whistling along the barren earth, kicking up violet colored dirt and forcing it into his open airways.  Coughing, his lungs burned as he gasped around the microscopic particles of dust that steadily coated his throat, raking knives of agony throughout his body._

_‘Can anybody hear me?  I need help.  Keith is…’_

_The words died in his mouth as the last traces of life slipped from the other’s gaze.  Even as he clawed frantically at the blackened armor, ripped the protection away piece by little piece so he could press his ear against the boy’s chest, straining to catch even a single heartbeat, no sound ever came.  Nothing would ever come again._

_The flood of tears dripping down his face were the strangest color purple as they splashed onto too pale skin._

Lance clutched his chest as he sat upright in his bed, heart pounding against his fingers like a jackhammer.  The fabric of his thin shirt was sticky along his back, slickened with a layer of sweat that made shivers run down his spine.  Rubbing his free hand across his bleary eyes, it came back noticeably damp.

It wasn’t the first time a nightmare had felt so real he’d awoken with real tears on his cheeks, but it was the first time he wasn’t quite sure how to deal with it.  For the past two weeks, he’d sought solace from the terror by trekking across the castle and curling up in a soft blue glow, allowing the beeps and whirrs of machinery to lull him back into a restful slumber.  Something told him that doing so now would yield less favorable results than before.  The peace never truly came from the place itself, but the comfort of sound he’d come to associate with a still-beating heart.

Slipping from the sheets, he changed out of his wet clothing with a tired sigh. 

It had already taken him far too long to relax enough to drift off after he’d returned to his room that evening.  Who knows how long it could take a second time around.  He wasn’t too keen on finding out if another nightmare was waiting for him behind his closed lids should he remain in bed, which left only one option for him.  It was time to go for a tiring walk around the castle.  Perhaps total exhaustion was the method to combat horrible dreams.

The door hardly made a sound as it opened for him, blue eyes flicking down the hallway toward the neighboring room.  The red Paladin probably wasn’t inside anyway, but that didn’t stop him from wanting to slink over and press his ear to the metal to catch a sleepy hum or the comforting murmur of unlabored breath.  Instead, he turned his back and urged his legs to carry him away.

Much like each time prior, the dim lights along the floor reflected just enough to see by, allowing him to slip down the corridors like a shadow in the night.  His stomach churned queasily as he passed the kitchen, forgoing his usual late-night snack despite the fact he’d barely eaten anything ever since he left the pod.  There was only one place he wanted to go, the one place he hadn’t been able to step inside of in just as many days.

The observation deck was quiet as he padded across the metal walkway, the floor to ceiling windows offering him a lovely view of a nearby gas cloud.  A rainbow of colors rippled through the particles, greens and yellows swirled with fiery reds and burnt orange.  Soft pink danced around a brilliant azure, but the best color of them all was an electric indigo so vivid and deep it made his heart clench painfully in his chest.  Just like in his dream, it faded tragically into the empty black.

A hollow ache ripped through him, arms hanging limply at his sides as he stared out into the expanse of space, imagining the distance between himself and everything familiar he’d ever known.  Normally his late-night walks to come and gaze out into the depths of the universe were lessened by a kind smile, a pair of ears to listen to his troubles, and a sense of companionship that sank down into his bones.  Right then, he didn’t think it was even possible to feel smaller or more alone.

It was comical, in a pathetic way, that the only peace he ever found somehow always correlated to a singular individual and their silent presence.  Keith had always been synonymous in his mind to things like ‘a terrible headache’ and ‘rivals’ and ‘broody.’  Now it would appear he associated peace of mind along with those things when he wasn’t in the throws of horrible anxiety over the other’s wellbeing.

“I wonder what he’s doing,” he mumbled into blank space, desperate enough for some sort of sound other than the typical low hum of engines keeping them from floating aimlessly that he’d even fill it up by himself.

When no one replied, he turned on his heel and left the room.

The sound of low grunts and colliding metal could be heard down the hall as he approached the training deck, stopping just outside the large doors to collect his thoughts.  While it was something of a relief to find Keith still sparring with the gladiator bots hours after he’d left dinner, it was also oddly infuriating that the jerk had such little regard for himself he was willing to collapse from exhaustion not even twenty-four hours after leaving his pod.

Stepping closer to the entrance, the doors opened with a low whoosh. 

Keith dodged a full-frontal attack from a long pipe with a parry from his blade, spinning around the machine and running it clean through the center with a well-placed jab.  Kicking its crumpled body off his weapon, it shimmered in its place on the floor before disappearing entirely.

Three more bots tried their best to deliver similar blows, but he took them out with ease, swiping the back of his hand across his brow as the last one fell at his feet.  His back was turned, but it was clear from the large stripe of wetness down his black shirt and the heaving of his broad shoulders that Keith wasn’t going to be able to continue on much longer.  How he was still standing was a mystery.

“Trouble sleeping,” he asked, turning toward Lance with a cocked brow, a light flush dusting itself over his normally pale cheeks.

It was definitely preferable to the apathetic look terrifyingly close to death he’d come to witness on the other’s face, and for a moment, he drank in the sight of a living and breathing Keith standing before him.  Words felt like a foreign invader on his too parched tongue, so he resolved himself to nod in confirmation, earning a gentle smirk in response.

“Come to spar, then?”

“No,” he admitted truthfully, regretting it almost instantly when the other gave him a strangely guarded look.  Swallowing down the sudden panic in his gut, he amended his confession.  “I was just wandering around and heard someone in here.  Still training?”

Keith nodded, rubbing a hand over the muscles in his right shoulder and working them with a wince.  “I’ve been inactive too long.  Just because I don’t remember it doesn’t mean I can’t feel it when I move.  Pretty sure I haven’t gone three whole weeks without a single fight since we got on this ship.”

“You’ll hurt yourself if you push it too hard,” Lance warned the other with an uncharacteristic fierce scowl, wondering why he suddenly wanted to lock the boy in his room to keep him from further harm.  Since when was it his problem if the idiot overdid it?

“I’ll be fine,” Keith mumbled, heading over toward the control panel and punching something into the keys.  Flicking his dark eyes over, he regarded Lance coolly for a moment.  “I’m going to go another round or two.  Interested?”

“No, and I don’t think you should-“

Before he could finish his sentence, five gladiator bots appeared in the center of the room, brandishing weapons at the red Paladin as he charged toward them with a determined expression.  Lance bit back his retort with a growl, hands curling into tight fists at his sides.

Keith zipped around the place like a madman, dancing away from every blow and offering up hit after hit like it was a walk in the park.  Despite his clear fatigue, beads of sweat plastering pieces of dark hair to his forehead and neck, he still managed to take them on with finesse and expert skill.  If it didn’t piss him off to no end, Lance might just applaud the guy’s recklessness.

When he could take it no longer, he spun on his heels and stormed out, running from the strange emotions that bubbled up inside of him; fear, anxiety, and a sense of hopelessness he wasn’t soon to dispel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This bleary-eyed post brought to you by sleep-deprivation and the determination to post this sooner rather than later.  
> Hooray for Keef waking up! Now to torment Lance even further despite that. :3
> 
> Hit me up on Tumblr - Cherrypie62666


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